STL Gay Icon

With the recent departure of Jim Edmonds and the self-banishment of the weird CWE baton guy, there is a hole in the gay fabric (something in a nice chenille?) of this fine 'burg.

There isn't a whole lot to choose from here in the 'Lou. To paraphrase Rick Pitino, Cristiano Ronaldo ain't walking through that door:

Kathy Griffin ain't walkin' through that door. Yet, somehow her screeching voice can still be heard aloft in the wind.

Anyway, the selection of a STL gay icon by me would be similar to Mitt Romney choosing his favorite Public Enemy song, so I enlisted some homo help (sorry, just like the way that sounds) whose comments shall heretofore be in quotations.

Candidate #1: Albert Pujols"The only person I can think of that my mom, my sister and I would all do." Well, that's quite the endorsement. However, upon further review, Prince Albert (insert piercing joke here. ha, insert, piercing, gay. i truly crack myself up)

(for those confused, wiki "prince albert genital piercing")

As I was saying, Prince Albert and the rest of the Cardinals are a little too Crazy Christian to fit the bill. Besides, "power bottom" candidate Little David Eckstein has left for greener pastures.

Candidate #2: Steve Savard"Actually, I rather prefer Mike Bush. I saw him in person and he has a hot bod." Stevie shot down so quickly. That's ok, I'll still enjoy those uncomfortable pauses during Rams broadcasts, Steve. You'll always have a special place in my heart.

Candidate #3: Police Chief Joe MokwaMy personal fave - What, with the awesome porn 'stache, spiky hair, and pair of handcuffs at the ready... but, alas Chief Joe garners little support in most precincts. Personally, I blame the STL's Mardi Gras riot police crackdown from a few years back. You should have let the body parts fly in peace. Sorry, Chief.

Candidate #4: Garry Seith

The people's choice. I believe the extra "r" in Garry was the x-factor. "The only one on the list that you can envision carrying a manbag." I guess you can't compete with that. Research reveals Garry's favorite vacation spot is Hilton Head. I did NOT make that up. So, Garry, congratulations.

Actually, further research shows that Garry left for a Dallas station a year ago. So, I guess this is a "to be continued..."