Is This Woman Hot?

"OMG, she's a MILF!"

"Gov. Palin is hot, dude."

Really? Far be it from me to define beauty for the masses. Far be it from me to judge the tastes of J. Crew buyin', plaid sportscoat wearin', Dave Matthews listenin' frat boys everywhere. BUT, seriously?

We are supposed to be "excited" about a candidate because she wears some ugly-ass frameless glasses even Jodie Foster wouldn't be caught dead in?

Isn't there some "absolute value" we can put on beauty? Do we have to conditional-ize it with "...for a woman of 45..." or "...for a lady with 5 kids..."? Seriously, I could understand if she was making public appearances in a short mini-skirt or low-cut shirt (I almost said blouse - no, I'm not gay). However, anything we have seen her in seems to be from the 'Jacklyn Smith Frumpy Alaskan Housewife' collection.

I'm not even (that) upset that people are going to vote for her because she's hot. I just don't think she's hot.

Before you write me off as a pig because I am anti-cougar or anti-breeder, allow me to retort. I have a wide berth and unusual slants when it comes to this. Within the 15 year age window that I have dated in since 2005, the highest age bracket has been, by far, the hottest in my opinion. Bjork is my celebrity exception for crissakes. OK, maybe I am anti-breeder, but stay with me...

Finally, as beauty is at least 27% beyond looks - is there any way a gun toting, pro-lifey, Mrs. degree earning from Idaho, oil bidness flunkee, abstinence only fascist that sounds like Marge from Fargo be considered hot?

Actually, maybe the gun toting and Marge sounding-like thing together could work if the porn plotline was good enough and the production values were okay...